Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Lost Trust

A story of lost trust...

Mom and Dad bring complex baby home from hospitals.

Mom and Dad get unwanted, hands-on emergency medical training in handling acute events... over and over.

Events happen spontaneously. They live in fear.

Mom and Dad live on-guard at all times. Mom sleeps very little.

Nursing care arrives like a dream come true after a year of nightmares.

After swinging door of nurses, finally they have a dependable, routine established with knowledgable, caring professionals.

Mom and Dad finally sleep in peace. AHHH.

Last week: Mom has pangs of concern over a series of odd circumstances but believes the best of caring night nurse.

Mom hears baby crying in the night and not clearing airway well of secretions.

Mom enters room. No Nurse.

Mom searches house. No Nurse.

Mom looks outside. No Nurse or Nurse car.

Nurse eventually comes in sheepishly. Mom breaks down.

Where was said Nurse? Nurse says he took a walk to stay awake and has done this for quite some time. Nurse says it will never happen again.

Mom is astounded. All trust is lost.

Baby's life was not important to Nurse.

Agency says no other nurses are available and that after they reamed said Nurse, no such events should happen again.

Mom finds herself researching Nurse and finds odd statements online by Nurse that they feel empowered with past Hospice cases by the ability to call time of death.

Mom feels sick. Mom can't sleep.

Mom and Dad live on-guard yet again. New worries fill their heads.

Mom and Dad pray about what is best.

That is all I can say about my state of mind this week..


  1. Oh my gosh. :( I am so sorry...what an awful thing to have happen. Praying you find someone soon who is amazing, caring, and loves your son.

  2. Oh wow! I would be feeling the same way. I'm so sorry that scary! I hope you find a wonderful nurse that will love your son as if he was his/her own to fill the position. We're just starting down the home nurse path and it's rather daunting to think of trusting someone else with your childs care and life in your home. (((hugs)))